Celebrity Scandal!

Michael Lohan needs to stop, asap:

“Who’s out of control? Whose life is out of control? Give me a break. Going from place to place, being dragged around by Samantha so she can make more money off of Lindsay being there when she spins…She’s gone from making $7 million to less than a million a movie. Who’s out of control?”

Continued:

“I go to church. I go and help people in rehab. That’s control. How can she say I’m out of control? If they’re going to say I’m lying, I’m out of control, I’m going to show that they’re lying and they’re out of control.”

…And then he he continues to complain about his ex-wife, too. Errrg.

They finish each other sentences! Really! At the Venice Film Festival, George Clooney and Brad Pitt were all about being buddy-buddy and finishing each other’s sentences. It was so creepy:

George: “Brad, don’t answer that.”

George: “[Brad’s] twins are fine.”

Omg, please. Let each man speak for himself. How weird was that?

Not so happy when I read this today about Mr. Lohan:

“Everyone wants me to fight K-fed because he’s a notorious celebrity dad and so am I. It’s serious boxing. You have to go get a trainer. I have to register with the Mature Boxing Association. I called Richard Johnson [editor of the NY Post’s Page 6 gossip column] and challenged him, but he didn’t accept. I don’t care who it is; it’s for charity. I’ve been beaten up by the press, so I don’t care if I get a few shots by a kid half my age.”

Stop, Michael.

Lily Allen punched someone today, but at least she took a chance to explain wha’s going on with her album.
“It has been finished for a while now, I don’t really know whats going on with it. The record industry is a very political place at the moment and I am on EMI records, lots of people have been fired or have taken redundancy recently as the company was taken over by a private equity firm called Terra Firma. Many of these people were people assigned to my projects and now I don’t quite know what’s going on. I’m sure everyone will find their feet soon enough and I’ll be able to put the album out soon.”

Snafoos abound, but I’m back– and here’s what I’ve been checking out lately- Katie Holmes’ NYC walking disasters! This girl has been parading a ton of outfits too unspeakable to enjoy to the fullest, included her now “classic” high-water jeans, her giant, clunky sandals, and her too-fug-too-mention sweaters and scarves. I’m at my wit’s end– and I really think that she’s out of control. What happened to enjoying the cuteness of a new family and still looking like you’re under 40 years old? Honestly. And to make it worse– she could have fooled me.

Jenna Jameson has done a “Round II” with PETA to get pro-animal on us:

“Until dogs and cats can go on the pill or wear condoms, we need to help them practice safe sex—by spaying and neutering. Millions of homeless animals are turned in to shelters every year because there simply aren’t enough good homes for them all. The answer is as easy as ABC: Animal Birth Control, which means get your Fido or Fluffy fixed!”

Well, I have two new individuals who have entered my “girls who love attention and must kiss for men’s interest-slash-approval”. . . because Lydia Hearst was spotted kissing Aubrey O’Day recently! Yes! Before we get all excited, let’s keep in mind that this particular suck-face sesh was extra cold and impersonal, and by no means steamy. So erase all those Wild Things thoughts from your mind.

Check out the pics at Pink is the New Blog! You’ll soon be agreeing with me on this one, really.

Kate Hudson didn’t really seem to shock anyone too much when she drifted out of Lance Armstrong’s life, but you know what was surprising? Her ex-husband Chris Robinson met her at the airport with cute little Ryder and obviously couldn’t help himself– he gave her a long, long kiss even though the paparazzi were most certainly hanging about! That was quick, and certainly twice as surprising as the break-up with Lance.

You got us good, Kate.

* Paris Hilton needs to cut out that free time considerably.

* Sigourney Weaver dishes about being older.

* L Ron vacation, look bored.

* Joss Stone to be in The Tudors. Ew.

It’s times like these when I feel bad for all the horny teens out there– they’ll be forced to Google Eva’s racy Calvin Klein ads instead of just watching them on TV– her ad won’t be shown in the U.S. I started to feel really bad for her, until she seemed much better off than the Creative Director Fabien Baron:

“This country really needs a new president — this country is so messed up. It’s such a joke and it’s quite upsetting, frankly, how hypocritical this country has become. It’s OK for children to see people killed by guns? Spreading a little love right now would be a good idea. She is being a little sexy, but they are not provocative.”

“Nipped” in the bud, wouldn’t you say? (Couldn’t resist– you must forgive me!) Seriously, what do you think of Fabien’s response to the censorship of his bed-writhing Mendes ads?

If you’re looking for clean(er) fun, I recommend Sophie Monk car shopping .